7 Things Which Are Holding You Back
Happiness is our responsibility and just realizing that we are in charge of our life is empowering and scary at the same time. It’s so easy and tempting to blame it on someone else that some people even made a custom out of it. To move forward, you have to let go of some things which are real happiness traps and create a new vision for life. Here is a list with the top seven things you should erase from your life to feel fulfilled.
The Need to Control
Having some sense of control over your life is essential for a good state of mind. You need to know what is going on, what is happening next or what you are in charge of. Yet, this doesn’t need to become an obsession which rules your life. The thing we advise you to give up is demanding to have control over the things which are uncontrollable, like weather, traffic or the mood of your colleagues. You are not responsible for these. Therefore, you should not be affected. Try to take life as it comes to you and only invest your energy in the things you can change directly, like your mind, your body or self-growth.
You know that “Don’t feed the fears” sign which is popular online? It’s excellent advice since fears can be paralyzing. The first step of overcoming concerns is being aware of them and embracing the situation. Make a list of everything you are afraid of, from spiders to talking in public. Think about every moment when you were fearful, like flying on a plane to smiling at someone you really like. Once you have them on paper, put next to each one an experience or a dare to help you overcome it. Celebrate every time you check one thing off the list. Make this your personal quest.
The Self- Pity and Self Criticism
As we’ve already established, your greatest cheerleader or negative Nancy is yourself. Stop telling yourself that you are unfortunate, that other people are just luckier, that the fate always favors somebody else. Think that the day still has 24 hours for everybody and it is up to you to make all of them count.
Also, stop downsizing your achievements and talking in a lousy manner about yourself. Would you be friends with someone who continually tells you that you are fat and stupid every time they meet you? Probably you would stop seeing them after the first time they do that.
The Endless Excuses
Self-pity is just one of the ways we can find endless excuses for living a life below our dreams. It is amazing how creative people can get with finding excuses for not doing what they want. In fact, the explanations are a way to hide a fear of change or of action.
The only way to grow is to take responsibility for welcoming change into your life. You need to change your mindset to be ready for new opportunities, change your job to earn more or even change your partner if you feel stuck in a relationship which is not fulfilling. You have the time, you can get the money, these are only mental barriers, not real issues.
The Financial Pitfalls
One of the most dangerous obstacles against happiness is a downward financial spiral. Getting into debt can cause depression and seeing the due balance growing only feels like a black hole. The first thing you need to do is limit spending. Then, you have to think smart and look at your credit card from a dual perspective. Don’t only choose a way to access money. Check out the best synchrony bank credit cards to get an idea of what more you can get from the plastic, including bonus points, discounts at your favorite shops or free access to a wide range of amenities.
Give up the expectations you have from other people and stop struggling to fulfill their expectations related to you. For example, you don’t have to get married and have kids just because society tells you so. Also, stop waiting for the perfect match to make you happy. It’s not their job, it’s yours.
The Unhealthy Habits
Last but not least, life is made of all the simple daily moments. To lead a great one, you only have to make the most out of the little things as well. For example, take pride in your morning run, consider an achievement the fact that you gave up smoking or fast food. Kicking unhealthy habits out of your life will give you the strength to break other vicious circles which are holding you back.